Oh, The Places You'll Go

So Goes The World

Notes: Comment fic written for sansets, from the prompt 'Charlie has two daddies'. This fic is part of my My Two Gay Dads 'verse.


Charlie is four when he realizes he has two daddies. It's kinda weird because only one lives with him but Shara's got two mommies and a daddy that lives in a different house so three seems like the right number. Anyhow, Danny sounds almost the same as daddy so it must be true.

Danny does all the things daddies are supposed to do. He plays with him, reads to him, helps him find worms to fish in the bathtub, scrubs his face clean, feeds him, puts bandaids on his booboos. He never yells though. When Charlie's been bad he just talks to him, and the smile goes away and it's like he wants Charlie to get what he did wrong. To figure it out for himself. And the thing is, Charlie does. Most times.

Charlie watches his mom and his daddies. He sees the sharp not-smile his mom gives his daddy when he says he's going on a trip or staying late at work. He sees the slow grin his daddy gives Danny when they're all watching the TV and men are running around a green field and Danny says something funny. He loves them but he's not sure they're all living in the right places.

*

The divorce is a relief to Charlie. It's like everyone is suddenly allowed to breathe again. Like you might as well walk over eggshells in big boots if they're already broken. He cries, of course. He misses his dad. He misses both of them. To tell the truth, he's been missing Danny for a long time. He stopped coming by so much once they moved to New York. He'd once asked why and his mom had told him that Danny had better things to do than play with a little boy that asked too many questions. That made Charlie want to hit her and tell her he hated her and then curl up into a little ball. Later he saw his mom in the kitchen, she had red eyes and she hadn't even been chopping onions. Charlie was glad he hadn't said anything.

After everything settles Charlie works out that he gets to see his dad more now that he's left home. It seems weird but Charlie gets to like being a weekend kid. He has his own room in his dad's new apartment and guilt will get you a lot of stuff. And he has Danny back. Danny never comes to the house to pick Charlie up, but he's always there — at the park, at the movies, at the ice rink, at the apartment, wherever they go.

Charlie watches his dads. He sees how easy they are together. He sees his dad laughing, real proper laughing. He sees how Danny looks at his dad when he thinks neither of them are looking. He's seven, he's not stupid. He wonders how long it will take them to figure out.

*

It takes Charlie seven years to figure out how to leave home without hurting his mom. Or, you know, hurting her that much. The preppy wardrobe isn't much of a loss, and the goth music definitely speaks to his inner torment. Hey, fourteen, hormones — angst is his birthright. The piercings hurt, though, and one of them gets infected. But at least he gets what he wanted. The day he shoves his embryonic porn stash at the back of his wardrobe as Danny walks in with a plate of warm cookies and an embarrassed 'You're probably too old for this, but ...' is one of the best of Charlie's life so far.

It's not all plain sailing. Charlie sometimes finds it as difficult to connect with his dad as he does with his mom. But the difference is that now he has Danny — the oil that smoothes things over. Sure, Danny's not perfect. He leaves the cap off the toothpaste, he manages to make Every. Last. Thing. Into a sports metaphor, he gets moody when his teams lose and sometimes he just gets sad, but he's always there for Charlie, whatever happens. And he teaches Charlie's dad to be there too.

Charlie watches Danny. He sees him on TV, fierce and passionate and defending the rights of people to live however they want to live. He sees him running his hand through thinning hair and tapping furiously on a keyboard. He sees him baking and teasing and advising and loving. Charlie never calls Danny 'dad'. He wonders if Danny realizes just how much he wants to. He thinks maybe one day he will.


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